A Flower Crown of Youth

Flower crowns. Princess dresses. Epic sword fights. Not a faerie tale, just childhood.

            Those magical days when Pluto was a planet. My favorite movies were on VHS tapes. Mismatched clothes were acceptable even at church. Wild tangled hair was not a big deal.

            What happened to the days when I begged to go outside? It was a privilege to get to run around barefoot with the grass below cushioning my every step. The freedom to do a cartwheel without caring what another person thought as I fell.

            At some point in my life, I lost what it meant to be a kid. As I walked around my yard the other day, I took off my shoes to feel the cool grass under my feet. I looked at a tree that was perfect for climbing but I thought better of it because I was in nice clothes. I wanted to throw myself into a cartwheel but quickly changed my mind in case someone was watching.

            When I was a kid, I longed to be always just a little bit older. I wanted to turn 10 to be in the double digits. Thirteen, so I could be a teenager. Sixteen, so I could drive. Eighteen, so I could vote and be considered an adult. Every birthday never seemed to be quite enough.

            Here I am at 21, begging to be five again. When a kiss on a scrape made everything better. When someone was always there to take care of you. When coloring was considered homework.

            At times it feels as if the world has told me to leave my childhood behind. What’s so fun about being an adult? I began to search Scripture to see what it had to say about my childhood dilemma.

             There are two Biblical truths that resonate with me in this issue. I am a child of God. I am allowed to have the heart of a child. In Matthew 18:3 Jesus says, “Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven”.

            Children are dependent in nature. As the blossom into adults, they become more prideful and believe they can do everything on their own. Jesus calls us to humble ourselves. I recognize that I could not be the person I am today without Him.

Naturally, at times I try to do things on my own but ultimately realize I am going to fail. Jesus loves to hear from us. He wants to hear the inner workings of our hearts and He wants us to need Him.

There is another truth that is just as powerful. Like I said, when I was nine, I wanted to be ten, then thirteen and so on. Now is not enough.

I struggle to be content in where I am. Reflecting on the things I wanted so badly, like to be just another year older, have I ever craved so badly to be that much closer to Jesus? How often do I think of mundane wants and not what is truly going impact my life for eternity?

I need to learn how to depend on Jesus and be content with where He has me. It’s a powerful thing.

Take a second out of the day and let your hair down. Take your shoes off. Do a little dance.